#TDoV

It’s TDOV again, that’s International Transgender Day Of Visibility for the uninitiated. It’s a day on the calendar where we trans folk tend to celebrate who we are, what we’ve accomplished and what’s left to do.

I love today because I love the fact that who I am is celebrated, that me being visible is ok, that today I can be out proud and loud about me and it’s kind of too bad for anyone that doesn’t like it because hey I can point them to the calendar and say look it’s my day to day so please let me just celebrate it with joy.

This TDOV I want to challenge a narrative. It is the narrative that most cisgender heterosexual people seem to believe is the only narrative for trans people. It’s important to that I challenge it because whilst this narrative is true for some trans and gender non diverse folk it is certainly not true for all of us.

I’m here to say today, that I was NOT born in the wrong body. I was born in my body. It’s not a wrong body it’s a beautiful and wonderful body and it is mine for life to make the best life I possibly can with.

Of course that’s not to say that my relationship with my body is not complex. It is. Yes there certainly are aspects of my body that cause my gender dysphoria at times. Yes certainly there are steps I have taken and will continue to take to adjust my body to improve my complex relationship with it.

That relatiohnship with my body I spoke of it really is interesting and complex. There’s a lot at stake for trans folk negotiating their relationship. I know I have to question myself about my dysphoria at times to ascertain if the dysphoria is actually about my relationship with my body or is it about the dominant trans narrative of beihng born in the wrong body. Yes it’s complex.

Absolutely I was assigned the wrong gender at birth, but this doesn’t equal being born in the wrong body — well not for me anyway.

A few salient points may be called for:

I was assigned male at birth because a doctor took a quick peak between my little baby legs and said — it’s a boy!

I never felt like, connected with or was able to own that gender I was assigned.

I eventually was able to come out and declare myself to be a trans woman.

I genuinely have had and continue to have gender dysphoria related to my physical body some of which I can make changes or corrections too and some I can’t — But as I’ve stated no this does not equal born in the wrong body.

I have absolutely spent large sums of money to eradicate facial hair from my face

I absolutely spend money every month on hormones to adjust the balance of hormones in my body — This does not make my body wrong it does though greatly help with how I feel and move in the world.

I may or may not engage in any number of other procedures throughout my life. If I do it is incredibly important that I ensure I do this because it is genuinely about my relationship with my body and not about a narrative that is imposed upon me stating my body is wrong.

I say again TDOV is absolutely about celebrating trans lives and trans bodies. It is in my view very much akin to a Pride Day celebration day.

Today I visibly, openly and joyously celebrate my transness, my trans body and loudly proclaim I am trans I am beautiful and my body is wonderfully my body and is not in any way a wrong body!